Tough start

This has been a very tough start to the school year. I hope that as September is turning to October and as the weather calms down, so will the tragedies and the dramatics that currently are synonymous with my high school recede into the woodworking. Taylor got hit by an 18-wheeler. Keegan got hit over the summer (by the way, he's doing fine and is at school daily though not involved in sports to the best of my knowledge). Charlie is at peace but the students still feel the loss tremendously. We all look forward to his memorial concert next Friday. A close friend is currently pregnant (I've mentioned this before and as her due date draws closer I'll probably wind up talking about her more and more). A dear friend in this community is sick (Promise, I'm thinking about and praying for you).

Yet, in spite of all this, life goes on. We worry about our grades and our classes. We get bomb threats that leave us with one worry "Will we miss lunch?" (We had a bomb threat today, just so ya know.) As teenagers, we can't help it. We feel the loss of beloved members of our community and we do mourn them but there is always a part thinking about us. Perhaps adults are similar. We hear of the death of a loved one and we are confronted with our own mortality. We realize that just because we are young does not mean that we are invinsible. Yet at the same time, we believe it couldn't happen to us. We believe that we'll be fine and we won't get hurt. We believe that all those horrors we hear of every day will never occur to us or to those we love. Even if they happen to someone we love, it could never happen to us. Why do we convince ourselves of these lies? For they are just that: lies. It could happen to you or me. It could happen.

Charlie was a wonderful man. He was just beginning his life. He had his whole life ahead of him and he was an inspiration to us all. If he could suffer so greatly and if his life could be taken away so young, what could happen to the rest of us? I'm not saying that he's better than anyone else because we're all humans and we're all just as sinful and just as corrupt but Charlie never failed to look on the bright side. He was spiritual and he was always there if you needed him. There are so many people that just knowing they'd see his smiling face in the hall between classes got them out of bed. If he could smile and battle cancer, they could deal with the horrors in their lives.

This school year has started off horrendously and I pray it gets better. Oh, and in addition to the stuff I mentioned before, my friend Ali is going into the hospital on Monday for her CF. She's getting really bad. I ask you all to please mention her in your prayers. Just for a millisecond, if that's all you want. Please?

Oh, and in the midst of death and dying and praying and hoping, there's the guy dilemma. Josh (Lindz's ex-bf, my current crush, and the guy that I have been told about 50 times by Ali to "just ask him out already") kissed Lindz this afternoon. And it crushed the bouncy mood he'd given me earlier because it made me question myself and him and whatnot. And if I did go out with him would he only use me to get to Lindz? Because everyone knows that we're insperable. You get one and you get the other to a lesser degree. Anyhow, all guys aside, I must go worry about my English homework. We have a test tomorrow on Animal Farm and I haven't finished the book yet.

Before I go though, I don't want to leave you all with a complete downer of an entry so let me think a moment to find a good thing to tell you.... *thinks for a bit before coming up with this...* Oh, I'm getting my class ring! This is what I'm getting only a LITTLE different. I'm getting a purple stone instead of a blue one and the engraving will say "Victoria" on one side and "2008 ***" on the other (the stars are my school initials). And inside I'm having them write my initals or my first and middle name. Not sure yet. But, that's my good news. It was up in the air if I'd get one at all or not but I am. :) Time for that pesky English homework now.

Vickey