AOL needs to put confused as a choice under mood. It's a very common one for me.
Child protective services was here. No big deal as of yet. They're going to talk to me soon. I don't feel like writing about it yet but I'll write about it soon. I promise. I'm thinking very hard about this. Calie gave me a lot to think about, regardless of her lack of blog. Don't worry about that, hun. It's not a big deal. I'll write more tomorrow. I'm just so confused. It's so hard to give specifics. Give examples. It's just.... ugh. I DON'T want to die but I do want to not deal with this. Too many thoughts to cope with. I'll go do my english homework for my quiz tomorrow. Much love and return hugs to all.
Love always,
Vickey
3 comments:
I didn't mean to confuse you, hun. I had hoped to sort some things out for you. I stayed in the background because you had to sort things out for yourself, like Dorothy in the Wiz of Oz. It's not good enough to be told what to do, you have to know it in your heart. Making a choice out of anger isn't doing what's best for you. So, forget your dad, forget your mom, forget the past, forget child services. What do you want for you? What is best for you? No one else matters, Vickey. Only you. No one else's feelings, resentments, anger, mistakes, etc. matter. All that truly matters is what you feel and what you think and what you know is best for you.
You are, if you don't mind my saying, THE most atuned to life and stable teenager I've ever known (in writing). You have a tremendous sense of who you are, who you want to be and where you're going. You take pride in it, too, I can tell, so don't sell yourself short or let others sell you short. Sing your beautiful songs proudly, live your life proudly and stand up for your beliefs. You're strong as heck. You know your mind and what you want from this gosh darn hard life. You're not a cutter, you're a God damn doer, pardon my language. Cutters are weak and inable...you are strong and so able. So, don't sit back and let others make your choices. You're too good for that. Tell the truth, to yourself and everyone around you and don't be afraid. They'll listen intently. If they love you, they will listen. Only then, will they let you live the life that you want for yourself...love, Cal
Don't know what's going on, but I really hope you're okay doll.
you take care of yourself!
xoxo~Bernadette
I read Calie's comments, and she says so well what I want to say. I just can't put it into words like that. I hope you're OK. Take care of you, and really read what Calie writes, it's so true.
Sara x
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